The Library in the Teapot: A Visitor's Guide
(As compiled by Miss Hazel, with occasional commentary from Claude Moreau)
It has come to my attention that new visitors to the Garden Library may benefit from some guidance regarding our rather particular institution. While most mice understand the basic principles of library usage, ours does present some unique considerations.
Regarding the Entrance The spout-door is, of course, our main entrance. Please note that it occasionally adjusts its height depending on the theoretical density of the books being carried through it. Scholars laden with particularly weighty tomes may find it helpfully expands, while young mice carrying picture books might need to duck slightly. This is perfectly normal and no cause for alarm.
On Library Cards These are issued on pressed rose petals and must be aged in moonlight for at least one full cycle. Your card's scent will help the books recognize you. (I'm told the distinction between "summer rose" and "autumn rose" cards caused quite a stir among the Library Committee - C.M.)
Book Return Procedures The return slot changes location depending on the day of the week and the phase of the moon. A helpful chart is posted by the circulation desk, though it sometimes rearranges itself when no one is looking. If you cannot find the slot, simply tell your book politely that you wish to return it. Most volumes will find their own way home.
Special Collections Please note that the Restricted Section is restricted not because its contents are dangerous, but because the books themselves are rather shy and prefer to be approached with proper introductions. Miss Hazel or her assistant Rosemary will be happy to make the necessary arrangements.
Regarding the Card Catalog Yes, it does hum. This is how it organizes itself. Different genres produce distinct tones - historical texts tend toward a dignified drone, while poetry prefers a more melodious arrangement. The entire system occasionally performs impromptu concerts, usually on quiet Sunday afternoons.
Tea Service The library maintains a careful balance between proper refreshment and book preservation. Tea is served in special spill-proof cups developed by Mr. Thistledown after The Great Earl Grey Incident (which we do not discuss). Certain books actually prefer the company of tea and biscuits, particularly those in the Cozy Mystery section.
On Library Etiquette
Please do not disturb the theoretical physics books when they're rearranging themselves according to alternative theories of gravity
The window seat is reserved for star-reading on clear nights
Poetry volumes should be asked politely before being opened - they dislike being rushed
The ghost in the History section is quite helpful with citations but prefers not to be addressed before noon
Seasonal Considerations The library changes subtly with the seasons. In winter, the shelves move closer together for warmth, and the reading lamps give off a cozier glow. Spring sees a general reorganization as the books wake from their winter dreaming. Summer requires special preservation spells against humidity, while autumn often finds the travel books becoming restless.
A Note on Time Time behaves differently in certain corners of the library. This is perfectly normal and has been extensively documented by Mr. Thistledown in his seventeen-volume study "On the Temporal Peculiarities of Literary Spaces." If you find yourself spending what feels like hours in the Poetry section only to emerge and find mere minutes have passed, simply adjust your watch and proceed with your day.
I should mention that the above is only a partial guide. Miss Hazel maintains a much more comprehensive manual, but it has a tendency to add chapters to itself when she's not looking. The latest edition apparently includes an entire section on "The Proper Care and Feeding of Sentient Bookmarks" that she swears she didn't write.
-- Claude Moreau